Birth Story...Finally!!!

Thursday afternoon (Sept 4th) I had a regular OB appointment. I was checked for progress and was only 1cm, 75% effaced, and went from a 0 station at my previous appointment, to a -2 station. I was pretty bummed and made comments to quite a few people that "I just knew I was going late!" Will's parents had plane tickets for that Friday (the 5th) and for the following Friday, so he called then and told them that they could cancel their tickets for the next day and just plan on coming the following weekend. We got home, rented a movie, and had Chinese food for dinner. I went to bed around 9:30 or 10. I woke up in the middle of the night to some pains, just like period cramps. I rolled over thinking that I was just in a sore spot. It happened again. At this point, I was awake and thought to myself that maybe these were real contractions. A couple more happened, and although I couldn't see the clock, I knew they were happening every few minutes. I got out of bed and got online to the "Contraction Master". This was around 1:30am. Sure enough, they were every 3-3.5 mins apart and lasting over a minute long. I often worried if I would know the difference between real labor and Braxton Hicks contractions...well...not a problem! These were very, very different and I was 95% sure that my body was going into labor. I got up once to go to the bathroom and felt like I was leaking. I thought it might be my water, but it stopped and didn't happen again. I timed the contractions for another 45 mins or so before I woke up Will. I don't think he believed me that it was the real thing, because he told me to time them for a little while longer and if they kept coming, to wake him up. He had just gone to bed around 12:30, so he had no sleep in him at all. I knew that I didn't need to time them anymore, so I finished packing our hospital bag and got it all arranged by the door. I even finished some dishes and picked up the living room! I went back to Will and told him it was time. The contractions were painful, but definitely bearable at this point. I was still smiling through them I would just have to stop, lean against a wall while one was happening, and then I felt better. Part of me wanted to labor at home a while longer, but being a first time mom and 25 mins away from the hospital, I was scared to wait. I just wanted to confirm that this was the real thing! So, off we went!

I was still feeling good in the car, but Will was kind of freaking out! He was just excited and his tummy was in knots.

We got to the hospital a little after 3am I believe. I was so excited! We walked in, a nurse looked at me and said, "how can I help you?" ....What do you think I'm doing here? haha. I said, "I, uhm, I think it's time" and she immediately put me in a room and in a gown. A different nurse came in and asked me a few questions. I told her how often the contractions were coming and about the possible loss of liquid earlier in the morning. She got me all set and hooked up to the heartrate and contraction monitors. Sure enough, they were every 3 mins apart and lasting quite a while. She then prepared her kit to check to see if the fluid that I felt was my water. They can't use KY Jelly to insert the tool and she had to get just the right angle to SEE my cervix. It hurt!! She kept having to move the metal thing around. Finally, she got what she needed, and was able to do a dilation check. I was still only a 2, although that was better than the 1 that I had been the day before. Normally they would send you home being only 2cm, but we had some interesting results from the fluid test. Apparently under the microscope, they saw ONE fern. Normally, if your water is broken or leaking, there are ferns everywhere. They thought that it was quite odd to only find one, so they weren't really sure if I was leaking fluid or not, and they couldn't re-do the test because I was now bleeding/spotting from my dilation exam, and blood contaminates the sample. The doctor decided that I should stay for 2 hours since my contractions were so close together and fairly strong- he wanted to see if I was progressing. At this point, the contractions were getting stronger than they were when I first got there, but not unbearble. That being said, they had me in the bed hooked up to the monitors still, and I knew that I couldn't and did not want to labor stuck in bed. I told the nurse this, so she went off to fetch their ONE wireless set of monitors. Yay!! I got hooked up to those and was then able to walk around the halls which was nice. After 2 hours, they checked me, and I was at 3cm. They decided to admit me. At this point, we called everyone to tell them the big news. I think this was around 6:30am or so.

I continued to labor and was hopeful that it would go quickly. My contractions were definitely stronger and more powerful than when I first got there. I hated laying down, but enjoyed rocking in the rocking chair as long as I had a stool to rest my feet and pillows behind my back. I don't think I had back labor, but it definitely hurt. I would get up from the chair and walk around a bit with Will, leaning on him during a contraction. He would rub my back and remind me to relax, which was easier said than done. I found that I tensed my shoulder a lot, and those were easy to correct, but I would get annoyed when Will would remind me to unclench my jaw or my hands. I couldn't really help those. I also found that I would get light headed and my heart would get fluttery during contractions if I forgot to breath deeply. It didn't feel good to take a deep breath during a contraction, but it was what had to be done.

I think they let me labor for around 4 hours like this before they checked me again. I was still a 3. At this point, I got a little scared. When I first started watching my contractions on the monitor, they were in the 40-50 range (on the scale of measurment, whatever that was) but by now, they were actually going off of the chart and well over 80, 90, and sometimes 100. After one of the big ones, it wouldn't really go away, and I would have a "mini" contraction right after. Those were kind of knarly. I didn't understand how my contractions were getting more powerful, but I wasn't progressing. My nurse realized that I was nervous, so we talked about my birth plan and went over it with her. She was SO GREAT. She read all of it, said that she thought it was a good birth plan, and said to me, "if you want to do this natural, we will do natural. I can get you through it" It made me feel good to have a medical person tell me that they would help me do this. After she realized that I wanted a natural birth, she spent a lot of time with us showing me how to get through each contraction, and how Will could help me. She would let me lean on her and she would rub my back in just the right spot. She told me that I could labor and deliver just about any way I wanted, and she made sure that even though there was only 1 set of wireless monitors, that I could keep them throughout the duration of my labor.

My mom and Doug got to the hospital around this point. I think it made my mom nervous to see me in pain, but I was glad that she was there. That being said, I hated when people would talk or rustle around, especially during a contraction. I wanted silence, and I didn't want people staring at me while my eyes were closed. The only person that I wanted touching me was Will or my nurse.

Contractions are something special, that's for sure! I could feel one coming on, I would make sure that Will was around to either lean on or to rub my back, I would take a deep break right before the peak, either moan a little bit or quietly say "ow, ow, ow" and then it got better on the downslope. My back actually quit hurting, but the pain went to my hips. I felt like they were being ripped apart. Between contractions, Will would help me lift my leg and pull it towards my chest which felt great. I felt like I was doing okay, until I got checked again....I thought for sure that I had been making progress, and I told Will that I thought I was at least a 5, maybe 6.

Nope. Still a 3. "Almost 4". I believe it was around 1:30 pm at this point. I started to cry. I told Will that I didn't think I could do it anymore, not like this, not without progression. I said that I didn't care about a natural birth anymore, that I just wanted it to be over with. I was really upset. My nurse came in during my freak out. She said that we could start Pitocin and I could get the epidural, but that she wanted me to wait for 2 more hours. She told me that she had faith that I could do this naturally, and that because Reid was doing fine, we didn't need to start the Pitocin yet. She also said that even if we had to do the Pitocin, that she could get me through it naturally, but that "it wouldn't be easy". I still felt like she was encouraging me to go natural, and so was Will. In my hysterics, I kept saying that I didn't care about my natural birth plan. Will reminded me how important it was to me, and to give it one more try. They both told me how great I was doing and how strong I was. I didn't feel strong, not at all. I felt weak. I felt weak for asking for the pain meds. I was tired. Begrudgingly, I agreed to wait 2 more hours to make my decision. I kept watching the contractions on the monitor and wondering how in the heck I was not even out of "early labor". I thought to myself, "if it hurts this badly and they are this strong now, how will I handle it if I made it to 6 or 7 and get stuck again?"

I was not a happy camper over the next 2 hours. Mentally, I had made up my mind that it I wasn't at least a 5 or a 6 when they checked me next, I would get the pitocin and the epidural. Probably a grave mistake on my end to let my mind get to that point, but it happened. During those 2 hours, I don't think I sat down once. We walked around and I stayed on my feet, hoping that the pressure would help me progress. The nurse came in to check me around 3:00 I think. I was still barely a 4. I started crying hyserically again, and told them that I had made up my mind. She told me that it was in my best interest to start the Pitocin, but that we could give it a try without the epidural. She said that she wanted me to start the pitocin and see how I did with my pain level. I said no. I said that I wanted the epidural. I think Will was a little disappointed with me, but I didn't really care. I lost my ability to see anything except for the way I felt at that moment. I was scared, I was frustrated, and I just wanted to have my baby boy. I no longer cared about what I thought I wanted before. All of the mental preparation that I had done, it went down the drain. I never thought that I would be stuck between 3-4 cm for over 12 hours, possibly need pitocin, and therefor, I don't think I was truly prepared for the natural birth that I had planned. I knew that I could get through each contraction, but what I couldn't handle was the thought of doing so for another 12+ hours, maybe longer. If I knew that I only had a few more hours of it, I could have done it.

By this point, my dad and Rene had arrived. They were down the hall with my mom and step-dad at the cafeteria. We called them and told them that we were going to get the epidural and start the pitocin. The anesthesiologist came in and explained my options to me. I could either do a traditional epidural or an intratecal. I felt like the anesthesiologist was trying to sell me on the interthecal, but I told him that I just wanted the epidural. He said that it could take 30 mins to take effect, vs the almost instant relief of the intrathecal. I didn't care, I could handle 30 more mins of pain. He came back with his supplies. I sat on the edge of the bed, the nurse held my hands and let me put my head on her chest. I was surprised at how long it took. He gave me a topical numbing thing (shots I think) before he did the actual epidural needle. I didn't even feel it, but I did feel him threading the cathetor into my spine. That was not a good feeling, pretty gross actually. I felt when he actually put the medication in because my whole back felt cold. It took about 15 mins to feel the relief. At this point, I was very grateful for it. However, there was one spot in my right hip socket/lower uterus that wasn't numb. It felt like it didn't get any pain meds at all. I told the nurse and she had me lean on pillows, and eventually, that spot went numb too. Oh, after we made the decision to start the Pitocin and get the epidural, they had to pump me full of IV fluids. They put 1000ccs into me as quickly as the machine would pump it. With an epidural, they had to put me on a cathetor since I couldn't feel when I needed to pee. I have never seen a cathetor bag fill up so fast! At this point, they also took me off of the wireless monitors and put me on the regular ones since I was confined to the bed anyway. Shortly after I got the epidural, my oxygen level dropped to 97%, so they came in and put me on an oxygen nose piece. Joy. I didn't feel like my levels went down, I felt fine, but whatever.

Right after they put my oxygen on and the epidural really started to kick in, my phone rang. I thought it was one of my friends, so I answered it (I use the same phone for work calls and for my personal cell). It was one of my clients!! Oops. I talked to her for almost 10 mins and sold her an advertisement! haha. I didn't tell her where I was, but figured it would make for a funny story after the fact. I had to call my work really quick to tell them about the client, they were just blown away that I had sold something while in labor. That's how great I felt after the epidural.

I was in a great mood, I felt good, and I was happy. I didn't regret getting the epidural at all. The pitocin had been started, and I could watch what it was doing to my contractions on the monitor. Wowza. I don't think I could have handled those kind of contractions on the Pitocin without pain meds. I really don't. I kind of lost track of time at this point because by now, I was letting everyone into the room, they were coming and going, we were talking and laughing. I opened a few gifts that people had brought in for me and for Reid. My dad got us a stuffed bear which I held onto for a while. My best friend Nadia got me all kinds of things to "make me feel beautiful"- Bedhead hair products, Smashbox makeup, etc. Everyone was so generous. At one point, Will and Doug got tired and they both fell asleep on the pull out bed! Too funny.

The nurse kept coming in and adjusting the Pitocin. It kept making my contractions too frequent, and they wanted them to be less frequent but more powerful. They finally got it right, so I was checked again. I was a 6. Still just a 6!! I was terrified that "c-section" would be mentioned, but the nurse assured me that because Reid was doing fine, we were on no time limits. That made me feel better. They decided that it was time to break my water (they determined by this point that it was still intact and hadn't broken earlier in the morning). The doc came in to do this, the doc on shift was not one of my regular doctors, but I liked her. She seemed nice and very professional. As soon as she broke my water, they discovered meconium. Reid had a bowel movement in his waters. They explained to me that because of this, some things would be different right after delivery. Normal procedure is to place the baby on mommy's tummy right after birth, but because of the meconium, they would have to suction him as soon as his head was born, cut his cord immediatly, and take him over to the respritory therapist to get suctioned before he had time to inhale it. She said that normally they try to get the baby to cry ASAP, but that they woudln't wtih Reid. They don't want him to take his first breath and cry until they are done suctioning. I was sad that we couldn't delay cord clamping like planned and that he wouldn't be placed on my chest right away, but knew that getting the gunk out of his nose and mouth was most important.

After my water was broken, it seemed to speed things up quite a bit. They checked me about an hour later and I was an 8. They predicted that I would start to push around 11pm or so. The whole time I had the epi, everyone kept telling me to take a nap, but I was too excited. Finally, I got a bit sleepy and decided to close my eyes. I think I napped for 30 mins or so, but was awakened by the blood pressure machine on my arm that would go off every 10 minutes, and I also noticed that I would get waves of pressure every now and then. I figured it was because I was getting close, but didn't feel like I needed to actually push yet. The nurse came in because they were losing Reid's heartbeat on the monitor. She would adjust it, but then we would lose it again. After about 10 minutes of fumbling, she said that we needed to do an internal scalp monitor. I was not happy about that. I hated the idea of something being pinned to my baby's head. As she was doing to do it, she stopped and said, "Well, nevermind about that, you're fully dilated and +2 station. Ready to get this show on the road?" YAY!!!!

I did a few practice pushes with the nurse. She said that I was a great pusher and said I was doing it exactly right. After a couple of practices, she asked Will if he wanted to see the baby's head!!! He said yes. She showed him, and he started to cry!! It was the sweetest, most amazing thing to see him get so excited and emotional. I continued to push with the nurse for a while while we waited for the OB on call to get there (same one that broke my water a few hours before). I wanted her to hurry up and get there so that we could get down to business! Even thought I had the epi, I could feel when it was time to push because of the pressure. We took off the contraction monitor and the nurse was using her hand to confirm when I was having a contraction. She was holding one leg and DH was holding the other, and I had my hands under my thighs. She asked if I wanted a mirror to watch, and I said HECK YEAH!! I looooved seeing his little head, all full of hair! The doc finally got there and we got all ready for some serious pushing. I pushed with her a few times, and then I knew I was really close when she put on her mask and actually sat down at the end of the bed. Right around this time, Will's parents arrived!! Just in time!! I would push in a series of 3, and even though the 3rd in the set was always the most difficult (I would run out of breath and energy) I felt like I made the most progress then. I really feel like it helped when I closed my eyes during a push and envisioned him moving down and coming out. I enjoyed giving it my all, knowing that if I pushed just a little bit harder, my son would be here that much sooner.

After 2 hours of pushing and 23 hours of labor, Reid William was born at 12:34am. I felt his head crown and pop out- everyone in the room cheered! The doc suctioned his nose and mouth, and then I gave one more push as she pulled, and out he came!! Will got to hold one of the clamps for the doc as she cut his cord. She then handed him to the respirtory therapist who worked on him with the nurse in the little portable station not 3 feet from my bed. I got to watch, and although I couldn't really see him, it made me feel better that Will and my dad were standing right over him and no one seemed concerned. After 4-5 mintues or so, they determined that he was fine, and they put him on my chest. I did it! I had my baby boy!!

I ended up with a 2nd degree tear, but other than that, I felt great right after birth.

Although it was FAR from what I planned, I can't say that I have any ill feelings towards my birth. If interventions had been pressed on me, I would have felt taken advantage of, but all decisions were my own. Sure, I'm disappointed that I didn't get a natural birth, and I'm a bit disappointed in myself for not being strong enough to forgo the epidural, but it's not like I had a fast or easy labor. I know that a long labor can be done naturally, but it just wasn't possible for me, and that is no ones fault but my own. I really hope that I can have a natural birth next time around, but for now, I am able to look at my sweet, healthy, perfect little boy and say that I truly enjoyed giving birth to him.

Reid William
9/6/08
12:34 am
7lbs 14 oz
19" long









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